Using That Pause – Power of the Pause Version 2.0 TEEN EDITION

I’m so excited to share my experience using the Power of the Pause with you on my Mom’s Phenomenal Blog. I’m 14 years old and getting ready to start high school, and think it is a great time to tell you about how much I have benefited from this strategy in my life – especially over the past year. I hope this will also inspire other teenagers to communicate more effectively.

Reacting to a situation out of anger and frustration is something I’m sure we have all done before. We often react to something without thinking or reflecting on the situation first. Reacting to something right away can make a simple misunderstanding into a large problem, or you might say something that can be very hurtful to someone that you later regret. Instead of responding right away, take a pause – having that time to think and not react allows you to come up with an appropriate and well-thought-out response. In doing so you get to say what you think about a situation in a way that is respectful but also direct and clear.

I personally use the power of the pause often. I use it in school, in tough conversations or situations, in my relationships with friends, family, etc. In using this skill I have learned that it’s not necessary to respond to something right away and that it’s okay to take a break/pause. I have found that when I use this skill I am able to communicate in a more positive way. Also, I feel way better and more comfortable when I’m in a tough situation because I am aware that I can take that pause. There is also usually a change in how other people respond  when I use this pause because they get to think as well so their responses are more clear and respectful.

An example of a time that I have used this skill was in a past relationship. I was put in an uncomfortable and hard situation, and it helped me to be able to communicate and respond appropriately. This situation happened to be over text so it was harder not to respond right away because often times when texting we feel like we need to respond quickly. When I look back now on how that texting/chat went, I’m happy because my responses were clear and not hurtful.

Some advice that I would give people who are using the power of the pause is that it will take time and a large amount of effort but it will be worth it in the end so keep going and try your best. Also, it may be a good idea to let the person with whom you are talking to (if it’s a problem/situation with another person) that you need space so that they are aware that you don’t want to talk at that exact moment. Lastly, be proud of yourself after dealing with the situation for your effort because you’ve done a good job.

This fall I will be starting high school and I’m sure that the power of the pause will help me and I will continue to use it! There are also a few other tips that I think people who are going to high school should really keep in mind.

1. Stay true to yourself. Always be yourself and stay true to what you feel in your heart.
2. Be open-minded so that you can make new friends and try new things.
3. Be kind. Be nice to everyone (even if they aren’t nice to you) and look at the positive side of things.

I hope that by using these three little tips I personally will have a great and positive experience in high school and I think that you will too!!!

I also wanted to mention that I learned the power of the pause skill from my truly phenomenal mom (no pun intended 😊). She introduced me to the power of the pause so that I can communicate more effectively and respond more appropriately. I’m really thankful that she could help me and guide me when first trying the power of the pause and how she continues to support me.

By: Zoë den Hollander